Growing up I was motivated by validation- my identity and sense of self worth literally depended on it. I worked hard to maintain stellar grades for validation from my parents, and when i wasn´t in the top 10percentile i felt so unworthy . it was a toxic trait that haunted me through my teenage years ,my dating life and eventually bled into my previous marriage . I wasnt sure if i was extremely heart broken because he'd walked out on me while i was pregnant with our second child or if that vessel of self worth and validation was dry - I had somehow convinced myself that being happily married meant you were 'seen and valued 'in the community. Needless to say that mindset was absolutely disgusting. After months of therapy, coaching and counseling , I found my true self 'ElleForum'my identity, worth , self esteem and BOSS BITCH ENERGY had nothing to do with external validation. what's most inportant is how we truly see outselves .